Hi, so I've been wondering if this is an autistic experience others share or if its just me:
When I'm at work, I run the register. It's not that bad because I can usually follow a script. Unfortunately, I often end up accidentally slurring, mumbling, or tripping over my words. I'll say things in the wrong order and such. And this happens enough that my co-workers pick on me about it, which is how I realized it's in some capacity 'not normal'. The best way to describe it is like my brain isn't working and the words aren't forming... and somewhere along the way of it going from my brain to my mouth, it gets distorted and comes out all wrong. It's like my thoughts don't... translate properly? Not sure how else to put it. Is there a way to improve this?
This is normal for many autistics. And definitely for me.
I run very heavily off of scripts. And any alteration to these scripts, or if someone even goes completely off script, then I get even worse. I stutter, skip words, slur, and talking in general becomes absolutely exhausting. And I also experience this when I’m in burnout.
Talking takes a lot of energy and uses several different areas of the brain. Autism is a social and language developmental disorder, so all these areas for speech don’t work that great to begin with.
Tacking a script over these areas doesn’t fix anything… It’s just window dressing. We still don’t have well connected areas to speech and social interaction. Exhaustion, sudden alterations, or just general usage, is difficult for many of us.
It works perfectly fine, mind you. It just is connected very very differently and blips occur in our speech very easily.
Scripts can be helpful but I also sorta hate them. I used to work retail as a cashier, and on one of my nights off I was watching TV with my mom and it was my turn to pick the channel so I went to ask for the remote but what came out of my exhausted mouth instead was; “Do you have a rewards card?” It was then I knew I had to quit.
imagine having a tattoo in honor of your dead spouse but that tattoo also depicts what is haunting your psychic friend’s dreams. imagine meeting a figure from your boss’ past but she’s literally a corpse from a tree and she’s taking you through your grief. imagine going out antiquing with a new, kinda weird buddy and he tries to start shit with a little old lady, who pulls a weapon him. Every day Orym wakes up.
equal rights for women will never truly be achieved until we have more female noir detectives
and i don’t mean some badass woman who doesn’t need a man and can kill someone in 6 inch heels without breaking a sweat or smudging her perfectly set makeup or chipping a nail. she looks like she grew up in a soggy cardboard box on the side of the road all alone. she monologues dramatically to herself while looking over the corruption-riddled city she works in because she has no friends or hobbies and will literally do anything except go to therapy. she gets beat up in alleyways so blood and rain drip sexily from her nose and chin but when she gets to her feet she looks like a sad wet cat. women want her but they also pity her. instead of perfume she smells of coffee, whiskey and cigarettes, which are also more or less all she lives off of. her voice is more gravelly than a pit of rocks as a result of said diet. she hasn’t slept or showered in at least 3 days and it’s increasingly obvious. she’s either divorced or feels like she should be.
Pokemon headcanon that once Absol are studied and people realize they prevent disasters instead of causing them, particularly dangerous workplaces get themselves a workplace Absol and it also decreases accidents.
Construction sites and fishing ships and factories will have one that pretty much just lazes about until it just gets up howling one day and knocks a dude down. They almost never figure out what would have happened but they’re always like “yes absol thank you absol I am so grateful to be on the floor right now. Can I offer you a treat in this trying time”
The Dark Tower in Scorpius : In silhouette against a crowded star field along the tail of the arachnalogical constellation Scorpius, this dusty cosmic cloud evokes for some the image of an ominous dark tower. In fact, clumps of dust and molecular gas collapsing to form stars may well lurk within the dark nebula, a structure that spans almost 40 light-years across this gorgeous telescopic portrait. Known as a cometary globule, the swept-back cloud, is shaped by intense ultraviolet radiation from the OB association of very hot stars in NGC 6231, off the upper edge of the scene. That energetic ultraviolet light also powers the globule’s bordering reddish glow of hydrogen gas. Hot stars embedded in the dust can be seen as bluish reflection nebulae. This dark tower, NGC 6231, and associated nebulae are about 5,000 light-years away. via NASA
Growing up my parents taught me that if you’re too sick to [insert responsibility here] then you’re too sick to [insert something that makes you happy here].
It took me a really long time to unlearn this. When I would get sick or have a “bad day” I would deprive myself of anything that made me happy. Watching movies, eating something I enjoyed, going for a walk, playing video games or just browsing online looking at funny cat videos. I wouldn’t let myself do these things because I was always told that if I’m too sick to go to work, or do homework, or go to school then I must be too sick to play Mortal Kombat or watch Unsolved Mysteries lol.
Whenever I wouldn’t feel good, which I later learned as an adult was due to sleep deprivation caused by my ADHD and depression (and of course the depression itself would cause me to feel like shit), my parents would tell me “if you’re not throwing up, then you’re not sick.” And when I would stay home from school (or even work in my later teen years) my parents would make sure that I didn’t have any “fun.” No TV, no movies, no games, no going outside, no arts and crafts, no books, no nothing. Just lay in bed and feel miserable.
I’m happy to say that I no longer do this to myself. Now when I’m having a bad day or I’m sick (cold, flu or whatever) I allow myself to do the things (within reason lol) that I actually love doing. If I’m not too sick to step outside for a few minutes then I’ll go for a walk. I’ll watch my favorite movies and if it’s a bad day or a cold (something that doesn’t hinder my appetite too much) I’ll eat my favorite foods. I don’t guilt trip myself anymore for having a “sick day.”
Just because you’re sick (whether physically, emotionally or mentally) doesn’t mean that you can’t do things you enjoy. You’re not any less sick because you watch TV. You’re not any less sick because you’re playing video games.
Actually you SHOULD be doing these things when you’re not feeling good because they make you feel better. The better you feel, the faster your heal.
Thank you! I needed to read this.
oh. oH. OH. I needed this omfg
Staying home from work when you feel sick means you are;
Not spreading disease to your coworkers
Trying to relax so your body can fight the disease faster without extra stress holding you back.
Too tired to concentrate for 8 hours straight
Too tired to do laborous physical activity for 8 hours straight
Not risking aggravating your symptoms and passing out or vomiting on the job
Staying home from work does not stop you from;
Doing relaxing things, like reading a book, browsing the internet, or watching a movie. These things take little mental effort, and are not comparable to working.
Doing some chores, ormildly laborious hobbies like knitting, writing, painting, or playing video games. Just because you are shedding germs that could make others sick doesn’t necessarily imply you are incapable of physical activity. Even people who are recovering from a surgery that removed an entire organ can knit and play video games while they heal. Part of their GUTS are missing and they are ENCOURAGED to do hobby stuff.
Going outside for a walk. Fresh air and the sight of trees and animals is actually proven to help you heal faster. It’s a verified form of physical and mental therapy. I encourage you to do it.
Feeling happy, feeling relaxed, feeling positive and stress-free; those things help you recover faster.
Take note of the COVID virus. Some people feel perfectly fine while infected. They might feel like they have a tiny cough, or a little tired, but they certainly are not bedridden.
However, it would SAVE LIVES if that infected person would STAY HOME and not go in to work or school.
To prevent the spread of disease to your classmates and coworkers is an ETHICALLY and MORALLY GOOD reason to stay home. You are a part of society. Extend that kindness to the folks around you.
Addition to this: the rationale of this among many parents us “my kid will fake sick to get out of school” - that was why I malingered so much as a kid. Neither of my parents ever wanted to examine why I hated school enough to induce vomiting to avoid it.
If you’re worried your kid is pretending to be sick, it’s worth examining why they would want to “pretend” that in the first place instead of assuming the worst of them and instilling in them the fear of being seen as “not sick enough” if they don’t perform misery to your standards.
Oh hey shit I wish I could have laminated for my mother years ago.
My teacher just touched my head (it was an innocent touch, like a pat) but now I’m hodling back tears and extremely uncomfortable bc I can still feel the pressure of the touch on my head and I HATE BEING TOUCHED by people I’m not very close to (read: my mum, best friends).
It’s a wonder I ever thought myself neurotypical
I remember when I started my job 10 years ago, my boss was standing behind me and lifted my hair (it’s long and curly) and reset it over my shoulders. She meant it as affectionate and kind, but it has been a decade and I still cringe at how horrible it made me feel. I just had to clench my jaw and I had no idea how to respond.
I’m starting to learn that while I love to give hugs, God forbid anyone else hug me (except family and even then only the close ones.) Like, it’s gotta be my idea or I hate it. But I’ve always sorta just assumed since I love giving hugs and getting them from family that I was being weird and to get over it since hugs and affection lije that are so important (and in my head I want that stuff, like to cuddle.) In practice however, whenever anyone else hugs me I can’t help but think “Oh God stop touching me!” And I still don’t fully understand why? Because it seems like such a weird disconnect and I’m trying to make sense of it.
Similarly, how I knew I was ace (not that I knew what it was then, life would have made sooooo much more sense) was when I got asked out and accepted sorta out of nervous politeness and having always wanted a partner but when they mentioned rules for kissing (due to them having a severe food allergy) my brain went immediately “WHY THE FUCK WOULD I EVER WANT TO KISS YOU?!” and I wanted to burst outta my skin in pure disgust. I knew it wasn’t fair of me to withhold that kind of affection to a partner so I broke it off. Nothing against the person mind, I just hadn’t thought about the reality of the situation, like, at all. I still feel terrible about the whole thing since I let them down over email but good lord I was an awkward piece of shit teenager.
